By Lenny Rachitsky · lennysnewsletter.com · @lennysan on X · YouTube · LinkedIn
Shivani Berry, a former PM turned leadership coach, argues that buy-in comes from showing teammates how your idea advances their goals. She explains three common failure modes: assuming others think like you, feeling time-pressured, and fearing disagreement. To fix these, she recommends three tactics: co-creation, presence, and storytelling. Her own early failure with a search feature illustrates how collaborating on the idea turned resistance into commitment. The advice matters because PMs depend on influence rather than authority to get work done.
01Key takeaways
- Frame your idea around how it helps your teammates reach their own goals.
- Bring affected stakeholders in early with a rough draft rather than polishing alone.
- Share updates as you work so others can follow your reasoning and add input.
- Ask open-ended questions about objections instead of dismissing them as misunderstanding.
- Replace unwarranted apologies and minimizing words with direct, confident phrasing.
- Trim meeting presentations to the context needed for a decision and move the rest to an appendix.
02Key sections
- Why buy-in fails
- Leaders often miss buy-in because they assume the answer is obvious, feel rushed, or avoid disagreement. Each habit prevents the group from owning the decision.
- Co-creation
- Involve the affected group early, share work in progress, and ask curious questions to improve the idea together. People support what they helped shape.
- Presence
- Project confidence through language and body language, such as cutting unnecessary apologies and qualifiers like 'just' or 'actually.' Presence shapes how colleagues perceive your influence.
- Storytelling
- Lead with why stakeholders should care and cut backstory they don't need to make a decision. A focused narrative keeps attention on the outcome.
03From the post
“Q: I’m a PM and I’m having a hard time getting buy-in for my ideas. My teammates quickly shoot me down, or disregard my recommendations. Any advice? That sounds rough! I’d be super-discouraged if I were in your shoes. But I’m inspired that you’re using this as a learning opportunity instead of calling it quits. To help you build your getting-buy-in muscles, I pulled in Shivani Berry, the CEO and Founder of Arise Leadership, to share her tactical, practical, field-tested advice. Shivani was a longtime PM and now teaches aspiring and new women leaders how to influence stakeholders. Unsurprisingly, this topic comes up often in her courses. We’re lucky to have her share her frameworks, and I hope you find this as valuable as I did. For more from Shivani, check out the Arise Leadership Accelerator for women, sign up here to learn more, or reach out to her on Twitter or LinkedIn. Getting buy-in for your ideas By Shivani Berry Buy-in is the lifeblood of Product Management. I learned this the hard way. As a new PM, I walked…”
Summary and takeaways written by PM Atlas; quotes are short excerpts. © the original author.